Time is not a doctor, so get out of the rain.

Quite frankly, I should be working on my Calculus I homework. But hey, I've had a bad night, and although it should have felt worse, I think I stopped feeling pain awhile ago.

All that said, I'm back.

I have a soul again. It's weird. I was reminded I even had one by someone telling me what I knew so long ago. And similar to a movie flashback, I had a rush of thought, emotion, and above all, -conscience- stirring back in my shell. I had actually cut away the bullshit that was covering my eyes, filling my ears, and was resting on my tongue. I feel I can actually think for once.

That being such, I've hit a proper balance inside myself. Honest, yet able to hold a secret. Brilliant, and motivated. Trusting, but not to a fault. From the bottom of my heart, I can actually have emotion again. Weird. It's like learning how to ride a bike when you were young, having it stolen, whereupon a decade later it turns out you just left it over your friend's house, and nostalgia is as nostalgia does.

All that said, I feel like an evil bastard.

For once, I told someone how things really were. I said what needed to be said, and maybe it came out wrong, but I don't regret saying it. The evil part is in saying what I said as frank as I did, and the bastard part in not regretting it. So I suppose being a hero is just being fake, humble, and always putting yourself in the best light.

Good god grief, is that really what this world has come to? Have I not seen it sooner?

... I still feel like an asshole. But functional love is impossible in this world, at least for me.

One day, I hope for a civil war, where the poor and disillusioned (not one and the same, though they might be depending on the person) fight against the rich and famous (likewise) and destroy the constraints we lock ourselves in. And as a result, we can start from scratch.

Because as unlikely as it sounds, people need a blank slate to start anew with, and they don't know they're as blank as they come. You can always change. For worse, for better. You can always remember, for worse, for better.

Let me tell you, the human race needs to stop being a bunch of asshats. Is that frank enough for you?

That's all. Check out [ Subnormality ] to see what sparked my recent revival. If you can't read the lengthlier pages, don't bother checking this blog again or meeting me in person, because I will slap you silly.

People should read more. You'd be surprised how much more understanding we'd be.